Save Money - Ditch Science

One thing that's bugged me for a while is that there's a name for toasting stuff - the Maillard reaction. Let me point out that someone "discovered" this. It may be no surprise that this was "discovered" by a Frenchman.

This term is useful to two people:
a) Toast Scientists.
b) Assholes who get to tell you that the scientific name for toasting is the Maillard reaction.

Ok, Science. You've done some great things for us over the course of history (penicillin, energy drinks), but it's about time you cool your heels. Think about your most recent accomplishments: computers are a great segue to the intermission of your history. Segways, however, are not. Stop while you're ahead.

if only he'd stuck to mustache innovation

Useless terms for words we already have, pharmaceuticals that kill you, leaden toys...a vacation is overdue. You've done some good stuff but everyone needs a breather now and then - you haven't taken a break since the Renaissance. You wouldn't want Scottie Pippen on the court after he's completed a triathlon, would you? Did you know that Scottie Pippen can't run?

Get back to me when you start doing cool stuff again, like baking soda volcanoes or light sabers.