Ring a Ding

Dumb ringtones are the worst. People seem to forget that a ring tone is something that can be heard by everyone, not just the phone's owner. And nowhere is this more true than in a location where cell phones are decidedly unwelcome.

One person in my office used to have the creepy whistle theme from Kill Bill as their ringtone. Of course, they were never around, so several times a day my echoey, poorly soundproofed office would reverberate with a disturbing whistle.

Another person, from Jamaica, has a Caribbean-themed ring. Yes, you are from the Caribbean. Every time I think I'll forget that fact, the repeated echo of a three-second-long steel drum tune rings in my skull, ensuring that I will never, ever misplace your cultural identity.

I think we just enjoy pissing others off with our cell phone rings. Hell, now they even do it in Iraq, proof that we did our best to eff up what's become an ethnic Frankenstein. Unless I'm mistaken, someone's cell phone went off in Iraqi parliament a few years ago, prompting everyone to storm out. Not because their phone went off in a parliament session, mind you, but because the little song on it pissed people off.

Maybe I should just join the boat on this one and start using Steve Urkel's laugh on my phone, though maybe that's already claimed by the Kurds.