Official State Jerkoff

In case you don't follow the news, a group of Ohio students recently got the state legislature to name the tomato as the state fruit.

Admirable effort, I thought. It led me to look at this further and see what other states have as their official food.

There are some notable entries to laud: Boston Creme Donut as Massachusetts's state donut and Jell-O as Utah's state snack food. There are also some points of contention: several blueberry, peach and apple entries for state fruit, for example. All have valid claims.

However, there's one state that clearly knows how to spoil a party when it sees it: Oklahoma.

They have a state fruit and vegetable...and the state menu item. Actually, scratch that - state menu items. To top it off, I cry foul on every single "menu item" they list:
- barbecue pork
- chicken fried steak
- sausage (huh?)
- biscuits and gravy
- fried okra
- squash
- grits
- corn
- black-eyed peas
- cornbread
- pecan pie

They can't be serious. Corn?? You can't lay claim to corn. Besides, how does it not get labeled under state vegetable?

Why would Oklahoma want to lay claim to these foods as Oklahoma state menu items? What an asshole move. It would appear that Southern states agree, having ignored this foolish broadside by neglecting to carry a "menu item" category themselves.

Oklahoma's official state "Other State's Shellfish"

And while it would appear they've listed just about every major Southern food, why would they leave out fried chicken? To claim innocence of all-out culinary thievery? Maybe they told Iowa they could have it, instead. Or perhaps the state menu ran out of room.

How could they ruin the spirit of state foods? Obama should get on this.